Things are really happening!

In the previous blog I wrote that we have finally found a surrogate (Melissa). From that moment on, everything has gained momentum. We have such a nice connection with Melissa, we still cannot believe it!

Blood work

Because Melissa was medically tested at the clinic in August, she didn’t have to do it all over. Only the blood work results weren’t longer valid, so they had to be done again. With the blood work, they test for diseases, hormone levels, but also for drugs etc.. The results took three weeks, but as expected everything was fine. Officially Medically cleared! We could continue with the next step, contracts!

First day of medicine, band-aids!


As soon as we forwarded the good news to our lawyer in Canada, she started working on a draft contract. On February 7th we received the first draft! A 38-page document with all kinds of agreements between us, the surrogate and in our case also her spouse. Because it is very important for us that the contract also fits with the Dutch law, so that the procedures in The Netherlands also run as smooth as possible, we have immediately forwarded the contract to our Dutch lawyer.

This all happened very quickly. The most important Dutch additions were that the spouse also has to give up his parental rights in court. And that the biological father should be registered on the birth certificate (and not the spouse). For Canadian law these agreements are more evident. But for Dutch law a few thing must be stated more explicit. It has also been agreed that if any declarations are needed during the (adoption) procedures in the Netherlands, the surrogate and her spouse will cooperate.

On February 10th we had a Skype call with our Canadian lawyer to review the contract step by step, so we understood everything well. This conversation lasted 2 hours, but was super useful!

Finally, all the adjustments were made on 14 February and the concept was forwarded to Melissa’s lawyer. After some minor adjustments we signed the 18th of February!

So in over 10 days we ticked off the total legal part!.


Because the future child, as of the birth, is directly within our responsibility and medical costs unexpectedly can occur. It is important to be insured, because such medical costs really can run high (hundred thousands of euros are no exception).

Fortunately, Dutch health insurance covers the children of a Dutch insured parents. Only once we are in the Netherlands and our future child is registered (possibly after a court case) in the municipal basic administration, the Dutch health insurance can payout (retroactively). So it may be that we would have to prefiinance large sums of money. As you will understand, this is not really an option when it comes to such large sums.

That’s why we bought an international insurance at Allianz. With this insurance, the biological father is covered for medical expenses and if the insurance is in place for more than 8 months, a newborn child is accepted without any questions. It is therefore important to bouy such insurance on time, so that the insurance at the (early) birth already runs already for 8 months.


After the legal part it was waiting for Melissa’s cycle. On the second day of her cycle, she had to start taking the meds. On February 24, the medication started with estrogen patches. On March 6, she had to go back to the clinic to do the lining check. Everything was perfect! We are so happy! Everything seems so unreal, things really seems to be happening!

The Transfer is officially planned! Friday, March 13th! Fortunately, we’re not superstitious, so we are sure everything is going to be fine ;-). 5 days before the transfer, Melissa also has to take injections. We hope the side effects aren’t too bad.

It is unbelievable that a woman on the other side of the Ocean wants to do all this for us! We got to know her so well in such a short time and we have such a great connection with her. We have daily contact and it is al so natural and laid back. That’s really special and we’re very grateful for her!

Four more nights of sleep and then the transfer will take place. Then it takes two weeks to confirm the pregnancy. I should warn everybod, those two weeks I am insufferable hahah. But we can’t wait for it to happen!